The Beard Bunker

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The Lachesian War is Over

If you're going to create your own sector of Imperial space to situate your games of Warhammer 40K ( and in 2020 we did ), it follows that you would want to fight some one-off battles in it, as well as short campaigns, and some all-out wars. Following on from the Word Bearers' raid on the Lachesis system (which we played through in 2022 and wrote up on Goonhammer ), everyone's favourite Chaos-worshipping gits finally invaded the system in July of 2024, when we added a persistent warzone . We then caught up with happenings in that warzone in October . This last January, the war ended over one final weekend of butchery. Today's post consolidates all 18 months of the campaign's narrative, followed by my reflections on how well the campaign structure worked. An Overview of the Lachesian War The extract below is the first chapter of The Lachesian War: its Causes, Occurrences and Consequences by Diokles Adrastos, Chief Librarian of the Cobalt Scions. Before I embark upon...

The Management Wish to Announce a Change

I've been having a think about my priorities. The Beard Bunker has always been something that is written purely for fun. We try to keep to a schedule, because without schedules nothing ever happens, but ultimately it's a hobby project that has to fit in alongside work, writing other things, volunteering, et cetera. Between doing the photography and the writing, I find producing the average post takes the better part of a day. Since the number of Bunkerettes who are currently able to post has steadily dwindled, this means that myself and Tom are writing the bulk of the content. This is not a source of resentment; no-one's being paid, and no-one's under obligation, but writing said content is, unfortunately, eating too much of our time. We both feel we could comfortably write one post a month. If we each do that, this means the Bunker could healthily sustain a fortnightly schedule, rather than the weekly pace we've historically aimed for. It's worth saying that n...

When James Gives You Lemons, You Build a Lemon

It wasn't immediately obvious that I had a lemon in my hands. The packaging promised me a Space Marine Gladiator tank. Certainly that's what my friends thought they'd bought me for my birthday, and very grateful I was too. And as proven the first time I built one of these things, a Gladiator can also serve as an Impulsor - just don't glue the arse on . With this new lad, I set about building it just the same way. I remembered how easily it had gone together the last time. All was well. Except, of course, it wasn't. Because it was a lemon. The citrusness first emerged when I dry-fitted the hull plates. That's weird , I thought, those are supposed to fit. And yet they didn't. I was looking at a 1-3mm gap, depending on where you looked. How have I got this so wrong? I wondered. But 'twas not I, oh no sir. This bitch had warped harder than the USS Voyager hijacking a Borg transwarp conduit. Maybe it's just bent , I thought. That's fine, I can bend p...

We Survived 2025

Life continues to be taxing for many of the Bunkerites, we seem to be hitting a lot of crises that are happening in the mid-life, but not the fun kind. Nobody has bought themselves a (new) motorbike yet (he says, genuinely considering it since I sold my last one about 6 years ago and I miss it). Nevertheless, Warhammer remains a beacon of fun and friendship amidst the darkness, bringing us together time and time again for a bit of entertainment and a reminder that things could still be much much worse. As is our annual tradition , we’re going to look back at what we’ve been up to this year, and maybe some hopes for the future. Tom 2025 has been much less productive than I’d hoped, but things have begun to look up in the last few months. The most obvious question to answer, is my Thunderhawk completed, is sadly a no. I’m nearly there but prioritised other units for the ODF weekend that, by the time you read this, I will have just had. ...

Six Meltas for Six Brothers

When Maisey painted a demi-company of Dark Angels , all with freehand squad markings, I envied his madness. When Tom painted a whole battle company of Raven Guard , I envied his madness. When Jeff painted a battle company of Blood Angels using, of all things, an 'Eavy Metal painting guide, I really envied his madness. I envy them no longer, for the six frosted Smurfs in today's post put me in the same sanitarium: a full battle company of Space Marines, all lovingly highlighted and covered in freehand heraldry. Upon completion of the company I immediately took to our gaming group's WhatsApp thread to share my thoughts and reflections at that time. It's a heady mix of pride and confusion (I made this! Wait, I made this?). There's also a certain amount of excitement that I can paint whatever auxiliary units I feel like without needing to worry about how they could affect the Third Company's composition. This was a particular thorn when fitting three-man squads ...

So long and Tanks for all the brass

So, I mean, hobby progress: I have just wildly increased my Raven Guard tankage by adding two Repulsors to my army, one regular and one spicy. But that’s not specifically what I brought you here to talk about today. Let's talk about the downsides of modernisation away from brass. So a little known fact about brass is that it’s naturally antibacterial, so all the old brass doorknobs we used to have were actually really good at preventing the spread of disease… hang on, sorry, wrong brass rant. I’m trying to talk about etched brass. Foregworld etched brass Not-Forgeworld etched brass Back when GW leaned more heavily into non-plastic products and also customisation and conversion was a bigger part of the hobby, Forgeworld used to produce these lovely sheets of acid etched brass that you could cut out and stick on whatever. Ideally suited for flat surfaces, although depending on the shape sometimes you could also bend them onto e.g. shoulder p...