The Beard Bunker

As Sirrus Bizniz' metalwaaagh expands, so does his need for things that smash face. Doc Feelgood and his Grötley Crüe acquitted themselves well in the initial tour, so he's come up with a cunning plan: any fangrot can now buy themselves a V.I.G. badge if they bring a wheelbarrow full of teef to Sirrus. Grots with V.I.G. passes are allowed backstage to talk to members of their favourite bands, will be treated to fewer slappings, and most excitingly, will be allowed to ride to war with the legendary Grötley Crüe in kans of their very own. The teef, in turn, will help fund the ever-growing fleet of the metalwaaagh. Everyone's a winner. Except the poor gits who the grots half-inched the teef off, but that should at least keep everyone on their toes. Three grots have already achieved this incredible scrounge-quest, and Doc Feelgood has quite industriously slapped three more kans together for them. Is he thrilled about welcoming random, ultra-stealy gits into his krew? No. Is h

Sweary Bozz did a lot with tone of voice; it helped compensate for the limited vocabulary. It wasn't that he didn't understand other ork words, it's just that he found he could express himself perfectly well by saying 'zog' and just sprinkling the feelings on top. He could, for added flavour, add the word 'off' on the end. For anything else, there was 'bog' and occasionally 'git.' 'Bozz, did you know Metal Orker is playing tonight?' one of his mates would say. 'Zog off!' Bozz would answer, a surprised grin spreading across his face. 'Can you get us tickets? I know you and Sirrus Bizniz go way back.' 'Zog off,' Bozz spat, realising he was being used, and discouraging said cynicism with a crisp headbutt. Lacking Sirrus' aptitude for articulating what was just so very metal about this band or that band, Bozz never had much influence of his own, but Sirrus recognised a fellow superfan. Bozz went to just as man

 Today is all about the robots. Big freaking, retro, robots. The kind that gave 1950s America nightmares. That's right, I've finally finished the Kastelans and their Cybernetica Datasmith. These models are so cool. I really love the 50s retro-vision-of the-future stylings. I know it's not to everyone's taste but I really dig it. These models I found really easy to get to the 'clean' painting stage. Spray with Wraith bone. Pick out the metal bits. Agrax Earthshade recess wash. Add some blue bits. Done.   Then along comes the weathering. There was many many hours sat chipping away at the chipping. I lost track of the number of Discord hobby chats where all I could say was "Chippy Chippy Chip Chip." However, despite the sheer amount of effort it was totally worth it. Once the chipping was done then comes the grime wash with Vallejo's Fuel Stains. The Kastelans can take any combination of Grabby Hands, Shooty Hands, and Flamey or Shooty shoulder weapon

It's been five years since I invested in some tiny resin real estate from Tabletop World (the guard tower , thanks for remembering). Their kits remain a joy to paint. So long as one is familiar with a drybrush, one is in for an easy ride. Today's post is really just a few photos of the finished thing, with a few tips on the most interesting elements of the painting. Using a brown primer The one change I made to the usual "prime black and start drybrushing" method was to prime with TT Combat's Laser Cut Brown spray. Arguably it's too rich and red a brown to serve as a universal undercoat, and one can tone it down by slapping a quick bodge-brushed layer of Vallejo's burnt umber over the top, but overall that brown tone really added some warmth to the stone. I'll definitely repeat this with the next building but it's a bit intense on the wood, so next time I'll hit all the wood areas with the burnt umber before proceeding to the drybrushing. Paint

 As any good Imperial adjacent commander knows, you always need to have the next wave of troops ready to exploit a gap in the enemy's line, reinforce your ownline, or simply hurl at the enemy. As soon as I had finished my initial 1000 pts list I got to work on the next units.    First I decided to treat myself to a character model. I think it's important to alternate between doing characters, vehicles, and troops. It breaks up what could end up feeling like an endless slog. Variety is the spice of life etc. I knew I needed to get a Skitarii Marshall as a second cheap but effective character, one can't always send out the busy and important Tech-Priests to do every little task. I decided to name this guy JCM 800 2203. Those who know will know why. Speaking of alternating. I dd a squad of Skitarii Rangers, because they are nice and outdoorsy. The (Imperial) eagle eye'd amoungst you will notice that those are not standard pattern Skitarii armour and coats. Correct! Wargame