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Ork trukk conversions ahoy

Wotcha! Im Grinbad Oilsmirk and Ill be your trukk salesman for the day. Honest trukks at honest prices! You wont find better in Mektown. You definitely wont find better down the road at Bozdakkas Big Wheelz. Bloody thieves in there. You can tell because all their trukks is blue. The trukks in here? Top notch. They was made with a need. You know what need I mean, dont you? Course you do.

Now you seem like an ork with teef. Probably got a mob of lads following you around, am I right? Need to get them into a good scrap without losing half of them on the way? Dont worry mate, Ill sort you out. Take a walk with me through the garage. Smell the passion. And dont tread in whats left of Pizzle, we ran over him this morning. ERGLI? ERGLI! WHYS YOU NOT MOPPED UP PIZZLE? BEEN SNIFFING GLUE SQUIGS HAVE WE? SO HELP ME IF I DONT SHOW YOU THE BACK OF MY HAND. Bloody told him. Sorry about that mate, right this way.

The Klassic
First up we have the Klassic. No frills, unless you count the nitro and the kustom red rims. One careful owner. Nice and cheap. But I can tell by the way your nostrils is flaring that you dont want bog standard. I isnt saying you is cheap, you looks like a bigger than average nob who wants the best for his lads, am I right? Am I right? No, sorry, wont nudge you again. Sorry. I know, we isnt mates. Sorry. Nice choppa, that. Lets move on.

The Beast

This is the Beast. Liked it so much I even put me favourite skull on it. Heavier rig, with a high platform for a gunner so you can have dakka wherever you wants it. No guns actually mounted on it right now, but well yes, our other trukks do all have guns. No, I ent trying nothing on, this just gives you options. Its not missing nothing, its about flexib that really is a nice choppa.

The Scopa
We call this one the Scopa. Its a recon rig. See the extra stowage on the front there? It's also got a raised turret, perfect for long-range gitfinding. One nob, alone in the desert, the eyes and ears and nose of the warboss himself. Ill even throw in some hand-held optiks if you like. Youre right, that is a humie ram. Tough construction, very reliable. What? No, I werent saying youre a pansy what only likes scouting not fighting. You want front line, top-end boss trukks? Over here mate. I dont offer these other two to just anyone.

The Speedsta

This heres the Speedsta. Fastest trukk in Mektown. One of the newest, too. Big shoota fitted as standard, slim lines so it goes more speedy, and extra protection for the engine. Solid kustom ram, too. Its got some serious tricks under those armour plates; first time we got it up to speed I could feel me face  flapping in the wind.

You seem pretty taken with it, mate. Is that a tear in your eye? I know, weve all been there. This is probably the trukk for you, but Ive got one more to show you. Our heaviest. You like heavy? You like shooty? Right this way. Mind that oil spill. ERGLI! SORT THE ZOGGING SPILL OUT! Sorry about that. Oops, mind the low cable.

The Tuska

Now this... this is the Tuska. Youve got to be a real nob to buy this. Which you clearly is. Most people get distracted by the toothy ram, but I see youve got a good eye and youre right, that is a humie rokkit launcher. All wired up to a big button so the driver gets all the fun. Spare ammo stored next to the driver to make up for the lack of aiming. Then theres the kustom engine a right grunter and that means its got the heft to handle the extra armour. The semi-ard case keeps your lads safer but still lets them shoot their guns in the air and shout Waaagh!

So whatll it be, mate?

The Suspension Spring Collection


Charlie: What this post means is that, in 2017, I finally finished my Speed Freak army. Theres no half-done orks left in the Box of Shame. I am a happy man.


  1. Brilliant story - just like the fluff pieces in old WDs. The trukks are great, they shar a common chassis yet each has a distinctive silhouette- very Orky.

    1. Thank you good sir! I'm very glad to have brought some old WD vibes to your life :)

  2. What a great read with my morning cup of tea.

  3. Zogin'. Foney eye ad moar teef....

    1. I don't want no scrubs in 'ere, mate! Talk to me when you's can afford boots and maybe we'll talk about how much dese trukks cost.


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